Posted on: 04 March, 2025

If you haven’t seen the “You’re So Funny” trend on TikTok, I’ll explain: People post a picture that says, “You’re so funny,” followed by a series of images sharing a difficult or traumatic experience. The underlying joke is that humor became their coping mechanism, so trauma made them funny.

One of the biggest surprises from this trend has been the number of college athletes, particularly softball players, sharing their negative experiences. These posts have shed light on inappropriate behavior, unhealthy environments, and the darker side of college athletics.

At first, I felt a deep sense of empathy and validation from seeing these stories. I know firsthand how challenging these environments can be, and I was glad to see people speaking up. But as the trend continued, I also started noticing an unintended ripple effect… young athletes commenting about how scared they were to play in college after seeing so many negative experiences. This broke my heart. Even after my own struggles, I would still encourage young girls to chase their dreams, because positive experiences exist too.

In response to the wave of negativity, other athletes began sharing their positive experiences to offer balance. However, this started leading to criticism across the board. Some accused those sharing good experiences of dismissing real issues, while others labeled those with negative stories as complainers. What started out as a funny way to cope with hardship turned into a divided debate.

So, what’s the solution? This isn’t just about softball. Think about workplaces where some employees experience a toxic environment while others don’t. Or families where siblings have vastly different perspectives on their upbringing. How do we acknowledge the validity of both realities while moving from awareness to action?

Here is what I take from this:

1. Action is more powerful than awareness alone. Awareness is crucial, but if it only leads to discouragement instead of change, we’re missing an opportunity. It is clear that several athletes have important stories to share, so from your experience, I would want to know…

    ·         What changes would have made a difference?

    ·         What resources do you wish you had?

    ·         What advice would you give to the next generation?

2. Both perspectives are valid. Those who had great experiences aren’t wrong, and neither are those who struggled. But criticizing one another doesn’t solve anything. Instead, we should be asking:

    ·         What makes a great program great?

    ·         How can we come together to truly advocate for better policies and practices when concerns arise?

    ·         How can those with positive experiences share the good things they’ve witnessed so that they can be implemented into other programs?

3. Safer feedback systems. There is a pattern worth paying attention to. The fact that so many athletes are speaking up about negative experiences signals a systemic issue. If athletes feel that social media is their safest place to express their true concerns, can we consider refining our end-of-year survey systems to feel safer with less identifying information?

I won’t lie, I seriously considered hopping in on this trend. However, I’ve always been encouraged to go from “this is bad” to include “here’s how we make it better.” All of the times I’ve wanted to “expose” I’d be asked… what’s your intention? This goes for all sides of the trend, what’s the intention behind the post?

Sharing our experiences is powerful, it’s important. I’ll be the first to say that we should speak up, say it with our chests when something is wrong, but highlighting what the better alternative looks like in contrast is even more powerful. This is not an attempt to call people out, but rather call people in - into conversation about how we can build healthier, safer, and better cultures together.